There’s always so much chatter about aging, getting older, combatting aging, anti-aging, blah blah blah - it’s obviously a huge opportunity for marketing products, services and botox.
It is often a brutal kick in the ass when you look in the mirror one day and see the signs on your face, or that longing nostalgia when you see an old picture of yourself younger and then…compare…with yourself…that’s not ever a good thing. I won’t even go into the media and the images we are bombarded with.
This is even harder when you have gone through cancer treatment and it seems like the aging is accelerated, like one year you were energetic, fun loving, cute, had great hair and light in your eyes, and next thing you know, aches, exhaustion, dull skin, weird ass hair (not ass hair, that does not happen), sadness in your eyes, and you are a different person, in too short of a time for it to feel ok.
I’m not immune to all of this, I am not gonna gloss over it all and say it’s easy, but I do have a lot to say on the alternative perspectives and I believe in them deeply. I will admit that genetically and perhaps lifestyle-y I am blessed with a propensity to appear younger than my number age, or what people think my number age is supposed to look like, and this is part of the comparison problem, everyone is truly different at a base level and sometimes we just can’t have what we wish we had when it comes to some physical things, c’est la vie.
Genetics aside, I still have hair ravaged by cancer treatment, a face that does not look like it did even 5 years ago let alone 15 and other “signs” if aging that depending on the day I find hard to accept - it really all has to do with my mood and how much I’m showing up for the other joy seeking moments in my life.
But we can change our thoughts, this is in our power and it’s a powerful thing.
Consider the quote in the photo attached in this post - “I don’t believe in age, I believe in energy. Don’t let age dictate what you can and cannot do” - said by Tao Porchon-Lynch who taught yoga till she was 100 years old, so much packed in here. You might say but age IS a factor in why I can’t…but the reality is, there is someone out there the same age that is doing that thing, so it could be said that the number age is not a factor.
I so believe in energy, and attitude and living an authentic vibrant life where you choose joy as much as possible. I also believe in exercise and incredible nutrition and stress reducing practices. These all contribute to that energy that Porchon-Lynch is referring to in that quote.
Think about the Rolling Stones, and of course specifically Mick Jagger. It seems impossible that he can move and dance and sing like that “at his age”, and the anomaly that is Kieth Richards, who’s hard living lifestyle is notorious, so many memes about that guy. But I think there’s a log to be said about the fact that they still do what they love, they ARE musicians, and they live the life they love and have fun (at least what we can see from what is shown to us the mere public).
Another public person I admire who has a wonderful perspective on age is Diane Von Furstenberg - she says “I think that people are too afraid of aging. But aging is a good thing. Aging proves that you have already lived” I love this.
I realize that both these celebrity examples have some money and privilege and genetics to contribute to embracing a lifestyle that might make some of these things softer to absorb but I believe that it’s within all of our reach to change something in our outlook
If we weren’t getting older that means we would be dead. Some of the issue could bee n the words, aging vs getting older. Aging maybe sounds like something that’s declining and nearing the end, getting old is just…years passing.
Getting older means being more wise, developing more compassion for ourselves and for others, more experiences to enrich and flavor our lives, and definitely means having way less fucks to give.
Wrinkles do not change that, not running marathons or taking cross fit does not change that. Not that age has to affect those things either!
A little botox or filler if that makes you happy is not a terrible thing - but nothing changes if your outlook and perspective don’t change too.
So here’s my prescription for love your age no matter what:
do what makes you happy
move your body as joyfully as possible
acknowledge your incredible experiences thus far
gratitude for LIFE and being alive
and it doesn’t hurt to eat vibrant life-force giving foods and not doing harmful things like smoking or drinking
practice stress reducing stuff like mediation and sound baths and all that juicy stuff
Also - Dr. Michael Greger wrote an AMAZING book called How Not To Age that will blow your everloving mind - highly recommend.
Life is too short to waste your energy on trying to combat things out of your control, and too wonderful to not practice and enjoy the things that are. We are all dying, none of us know when, so find that glitter in the every day
If you are a cancer thriver you know that all too well and if that’s a struggle for you - I’m here for you, reach out